Accepting My Cleft

I realize that it has been awhile since my last post and for those that read my blog, I apologize for that. I will try to post more frequently. That being said, I hope you enjoy the following post. NOTE: I will be mentioning God and my belief in him. If this offends you then please do not read.

For those of you that are parents of cleft effected children, especially those with cleft palates, there will more than likely be thoughts of “Why was I born this way?”. I know from time to time throughout my childhood and teen years I asked myself that question. I would look at my parents, my sister, and friends and to me it didn’t make sense that I was the only one who looked like I did. As a child it was very confusing, however I have been very fortunate to have family who have always told me that I am beautiful on the inside and out, therefore I never felt “ugly” or whatever other word I might have heard.

My revelation of accepting my cleft/scar came around the summer of 9th grade. I was reading my Bible like I sometimes do. I don’t remember if I was reading a devotional that told me to be in the book of Psalm or if I just decided to read it because it’s my favorite book of the Bible. Regardless of the reason, I was reading Psalm 139. If you have read this particular chapter, I would suggest it to anyone.

There was a few verses that stuck out to me, like an “Ah Ha” moment.

13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my motherโ€™s womb. 14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. 15 My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. 16 Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.
~Psalm 139:13-16 (NIV)

“Wow” I thought, “God knew I would have a cleft before I was born. He had a plan for me being born with a cleft. He sees me as wonderfully made!” It was at that moment I could truly accept my birth defect. I finally realized that no matter what I thought previously, I was/am beautiful to God and with that realization I finally saw myself as beautiful.

If you don’t get anything out of this post, please know that your child is special and beautiful and no matter what he or she goes through, there is a purpose on why your child was born with a cleft. As I have said before, I truly believe that I was born to tell my story, to show that you can be a confident, successful, and dare I say beautiful individual. If you are a “cleftie” reading this post, you have to first accept yourself and your beauty before you can let others fully accept you. Regardless if you were born with a cleft or not and your are reading this, know that God made you in his eyes and you are BEAUTIFUL/HANDSOME!

Remember you are fearfully and wonderfully made!!


8 thoughts on “Accepting My Cleft

  1. Rebecca, you are not only wonderful, you are an inspiration! Thanks so much for sharing!!! I hope and pray that my own beautiful little Mia will have such an ah-ha moment as she grows. ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. Rebecca,
    What a wonderful and inspiring message. I know that you are and will continue to touch the lives of many people in wonderful ways.
    Aunt Angie

  3. Aww sis, great post. I love you so much and you are such an excellent role model for me. You are so beautiful, inside and out, and I am honored to have you as my sister.

  4. Hi Rebecca,

    This is a great blog and I hope you keep it up. I had tears welling up in my eyes as I read this and imagined my Ellie 25 years from now. I hope she has a similar humor and perspective. I was a lucky cleft dad in that my uncle has unilateral cleft when he was born. When Ellie was born I was surprised but not distressed beyond knowing that I had a lot to learn. It’s great to read the thoughts of a grown up cleft kid. Thank you for sharing.

  5. Hi Becca,
    I just stumbled on your blog via the cleft chat group. I am very impressed! I can’t wait to tell my daughter, Jade about this. Keep up the good work!

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